Essays and books
Writing
I write for practitioners, and for anyone who has wondered why a room that was meant to help did not.
The essays are published free, on Substack, roughly a fortnight apart. They answer questions people actually ask, and they include the corrections — the places where I taught something for years that turned out to be the wrong way round. In the process of living, we naturally update our understanding as we discover new aspects where hidden perspectives now illuminate more of the picture.
Essays in the series
- What is the difference between somatic sexology and tantra?
- What is Body Poem?
- Why a frightened body cannot learn
- Acquisitive and attributive: two ways of needing
- What repair actually takes — and why remorse is the part we fear
- The five troubled turtles
- Limerence in the consulting room
- Shame: it is a joy to be hidden, but a disaster not to be found
- Touch, and what slow touch is actually doing
- The held breath and the return of feeling
- Every scar tells a story
- What does trauma-informed actually mean in intimate work?
The books
Published as they reach completion
I am in the process of writing books from my forty years of practice and research, and publishing them as they reach completion. They cover attachment and learning, shame, touch and breath, scars and repair, and the patterns that bring people into intimate difficulty and out of it again.
Each will be listed here as it is ready. If you would like to know when, the Substack is where I will say so first.
